aje na Auri Ya Ahmad ɗina me so na da ƙauna tsakani da Allah bada wata manufa ta cutarwa ba". na ɗago da ƙwayar idona da tun fara maganata ta ke akan cinyoyinsa, na kalle shi hawaye naci gaba da sauko min, a wannan lokacin ƙwayar idonsa ta kaɗa tayi jajir, haka kuma ya sauya zuwa wani launin halitta na daban. sai na ƙara saka kuka ina kaiwa duk ilahirin jikinsa duka ina faɗin,"Kabir ka sakeni, ka sakeni dan Allah, ba zan iya zama da igiyoyin aurenka a kaina ba, duk abunda kaje ka faɗawa Ummina ƙarya kake yi, kalamai ne na zallar yaudara...". muguwar matsar da yaywa tsintsiyar hannuna ita tasa nayi shiru, sai shashsheƙar kuka da nake ina son ƙwacewa, cikin wani amon sauti yace da ni. "ni ne nake ƙarya Maryam? ni ne mayaudarin?". na jijjiga masa kai da ƙara tabbatar masa sannan nace,"ai zancena gaskiya ne, saboda baka so na...". kuma ban iya ƙarasa faɗin abinda zance ba wani sabon kukan yaci ƙarfina, nayi shiru ina jin wani ƙunci da suya a ƙasan zuciyata. sai ya janyoni jikinsa ya haɗe fuskarmu wuri guda, iskar bakinsa ta sauka ajikina a lokacin da furucinsa ya fito da faɗin,"wa ya ce maki bana sonki Maryam, wa ya faɗa miki hakan? menene hujjarki na gasgata cewar bana sonki? me zan miki dan ki tabbar da duk zancen da na faɗawa Ummi babu ƙarya ac ikinsu?". "ai baka so na da gaske". "shi ne ai nake so ki amsa min waɗancan tambayoyin". "ba kana ƙyamatata bane saboda ni shegiya ce, shi yasa ka tsaneni baka ko son yi min magana, bayan bani nace a haifeni ta hanyar zina ba". sai kawai naji ya galla min wani mintsini a gadon bayana da yasa na miƙe zaune a gigice ina shafa wurin, kan nayi yunƙurin furta wani kalma yace. "naji fiye da wannan zafin a zuciyata, a waccan ranar da kika baɗawa idonki toka, kika yi watsi da tarbiyar da Gwaggo tayi miki, kika ɗauki huɗubar shaiɗan kika dinga faɗawa Ummi son ranki, da gaske tun a wannan ranar na fara jin haushinki, irin haushi sosai ɗin nan da yafi ƙarfin a musalta shi, shi ne dalilin ɗauke miki wutar da nayi Maryam...amma ko kusa ba saboda wannan negative tunanin naki ba ne". sai na saka hannu akan idona ina cewa,"to bana nemi yafiyarta ba kuma ta yafe min...ashe kai ba mutumin da zai iya yin afuwa ne ga wanda yay masa laifi ba, bacin ko Allah ma muna masa laifi kuma mu roƙe shi ya yafe mana". "ba haka bane Mairo tah, Mairoro wannan sauya mikin da nayi ya haɗe ne da tsananin kishinki da nake". kukan da nake sai naji ya ɗauke kamar ɗaukewar ruwan sama, na tsaya cak ina kallonsa, ina kallon yanda yake murza tafin hannuna a hankali. kamin na ɗago da ƙwayar idona ina kallon Kabir ɗin da idanuwansa ke ɗauke da full of love, kamar ba wannan Ya Kabir ɗin da ya canja ba. sai naji wani sanyi na mamaye min ilahirin jikina, ba zan iya cewa ga halin da nake ciki ba a wannan lokacin, amma dai kalamai sun yi ƙaranci a bakina da zan iya jefa masa tambayar da ke raina. "Mairoro duk maganganun da na faɗawa Ummi gaskiya ne, kuma duk abunda Ummi ta faɗa miki gaskiya ne...Mairon Gwaggo Allah da gaske nake miki, ni ɗan Adam ne ina yin kuskure amma Allah ba na ƙarya kuma kema kanki shaida ce". ya faɗa yana saka hannu ya sake kwanto da ni jikinsa, yaja hancina yana faɗin,"Mairo tah kin san kuwa tun yaushe zuciyar ɗan Kabiruwa ke ɗawainiya da ke". ba tambayata yay ba amma sai naji na girgiza masa kai. "ba sai na tsaya ina miki dogon bayani ba, amma what i want you to know shi ne na fara sonki tun ba ki san kanki ba, kuma ƙaunar da na ke miki mai zafi ce Mairon Kabiru, Allah ma yasan da wannan...kuma na jingine hakan a raina ne saboda babu damar na furta miki hakan ke kin san dalili...kuma lokacin da ya kamata na furta miki cewar kece zaɓin raina cikin rashin tsammani sai na tsinci soyayyarki a tare da Ahmad, kin san irin halin da.na shiga a wannan time ɗin? ba ki sa ni ba, amma ke na ɗorawa laifin, dan gani nake kamar ke kika ba shi damar hakan...Allah ya sa ni a wannan lokacin da ban janye miki ba wallahi i might loose control zafin kishinki yasa na aikata abunda ba shikenan ba, abunda zan zo ina danasani... lokacin da kika amince masa Allah ɗaya yasan da irin ciwon da kika haifarwa zuciyata, kin gani kin kuma lura da hakan amma tunaninki ya hanaki gane mawuyacin halin da kike neman jefa bawan Allah...ba zan iya ganin kina soyayya da wani ba, ba zan iya ganin kina soyayya da ɗan'uwana ba, shi yasa na bar muku ƙasar kuci karanku babu babbaka...Abdurrahim ne kaɗai zai iya ba ki labarin mawuyacin halin da na shiga a san da naji an tsaida ranar aurenku, shi da Ummi ne kaɗai za su iya ba ki labarin yanda soyayyarki ke nuƙurƙusar zuciyata, duk wannan farin ciki da kuma walwalar da na daina duk akan sonki ne...kuma sai da na gama cire rai da samun ki, nayi giving up da komai na rayuwa ta, sai Allah ya dubeni, ya dubi haƙurina, a lokacin da banyi zato ba banyi tsammani ba Allah ya bani ke, ya bani ke matsayin matata...Alhamdulillahi Rabil Alamin, amma babu ƙarya wannan me bakin tsiwar ta wahalar da ni, kuma nima sai na rama, Allah ya kai